Bannon’s crush on Britain’s old bootboys - August 2018 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - August 12th, 2018

“The skinhead smashed the still steaming grill plate of the state-of-the-art Breville sandwich toaster into his red face, to stem the violent impulses rising within him. His skin fizzed, like cold piss on a hot Guy Fawkes bonfire. Ancient burnt pieces of cheese and tomato, remnants of his well-heeled host’s cocaine-fuelled midnight snacks, buried themselves…

Trump’s struggle not to tie himself in nots - July 2018 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - July 22nd, 2018

I spent the weekend at the Latitude festival in Suffolk with my children, Nelson and Mandela. Like a good metropolitan liberal elitist, I had all my tastes and prejudices confirmed, and all in a safe family-friendly environment. But when I left the site on Monday it seemed that, while I was eating sushi in recyclable…

How to treat Morrissey? Stop listening to him - July 2018 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - July 8th, 2018

Morrissey fans have for years equated his more unpalatable pronouncements with the babblings of a beloved but out of touch relative. Some of the things Uncle Stephen says seem a bit racist, but he has seen a lot of changes in the area he lives in, he got food poisoning from a bad curry on…

Michael Gove’s hot air will eventually choke us all - June 2018 The Observer - June 3rd, 2018

In January, a sulphurous cloud of French pollution drifted across from France to further stink out vast areas of Surrey, its stench so powerful that it overwhelmed the natural foul odours of Eric Clapton, who dwells silently in the hideous region, a subterranean blues truffle. It was as if the smelly Gallic gas glob did…

So that’s Trump’s game – the second coming - May 2018 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - May 20th, 2018

Bear-baiting is officially banned by the bear-loving, politically correct, snowflake brigade. Go and marry a bear and live in a wood eating worms if you love bears so much! And I think you’ll find it was Adam and Eve!! Not Adam and Rupert!!! But after bear-baiting, Thomas Markle Teasing is the next best thing. The…

The full plans for the porn president’s visit to the UK – revealed! - May 2018 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - May 14th, 2018

Desperate for American co-operation with post-Brexit trade, Britain is hamstrung in her reaction to Donald Trump’s withdrawal from the Iran nuclear deal. A man in Southend-on-Sea, who just wanted bendy bananas, eats takeaway butterfly wings, and a nuclear missile hits Tel Aviv. In July, Guardian and Observer readers, their furious tofu-smeared faces red with righteous…